Marriage from A to Z

“Refusing to Change”

“I am not going to change!” Have you ever heard anyone make this statement? Perhaps they have not said it verbally, but their actions are speaking. Well, this statement is not an issue if your current actions and behavior align with the way that God wants you to live. However, if you are a Christian and your actions are contrary to the Word of God this is a problem statement. God is the only ONE who can say, “I do not change.” (Malachi 3:6) He is already perfect!

As a Christian, our goal should be to please God in all of our actions. When we realize we have said or done something wrong it is our job to make a change. God will often speak to us personally through His Word or have someone else to speak to us. When we receive godly counsel or correction, it is up to us to receive it and make a change or we can reject it and stay the same. Fully receiving it, means repenting and making a change in our actions.

As Christians, it is so important that we are in good standing with the Lord. We all have to check our actions. Here are two questions I want you to ask yourself. Is the Lord pleased with my attitude/actions? If you are married, Is my spouse pleased with my attitude/actions? If you answer no to either question, what changes do you need to make? Is an apology needed? Refusing to change is dangerous!

C – Christians must be willing to change. Jesus Christ is Our Change Agent. When we give our life to Jesus, He changes us. Some changes happen quickly and others take time. When a person gets married more change is required. A husband and wife should be willing to make changes to please God and to please one another. We need God to help us to be patient with each other in the change process. Refusing to change is not CHRIST LIKE. Get rid of the excuses like; “I am too old to change and I have always been this way or done this.” (especially when your actions do not please God) (2 Corinthians 5:17-21)

H – Humble yourself in prayer and ask God to change your heart. Ask God to make your heart line up with God’s Word and His will. A hardened heart causes a person to refuse change. (2 Chronicles 7:14 )

A – Align your actions with the Word of God. Allow God to arrest your old way of doing things and acquire new ways. When a single person gets married, there needs to be a change in behavior. Refusing to change will be a problem. (Proverbs 10:17)

N – Never say “I am not going to change or I refuse to change.” If change means being in good standing with the Lord, we must be willing to change. (Proverbs 12:15)

G – God is in the life-changing business. Get into God’s Word, it is the medicine for change. Take your medicine each day and watch God change you! If you are dealing with someone who refuses to change you definitely need to take your medicine to deal with them. (Romans 12:2)

E- Examine your ways today! Is God calling you to make a change? Has your spouse been asking you to do something that would make them happy but you refuse to change? Perhaps it’s out of your comfort zone but ask God to help you to make the change. (Proverb 14:16-17 )

Until next time. . .

Carolyn