Marriage from A to Z

Are You Secretly Dealing with Soul Ties?

Are you married but still have thoughts about someone that you were in an intimate relationship with before you got married?  Are you single and still thinking about the last person that you were intimate with?  Do you have reoccurring thoughts about a person that you just can’t shake?  Do you feel emotionally or physically connected to someone that is not your spouse?  Have you experienced some premarital sex that you can’t get out of your mind?  Do you wake up or go to bed emotionally tired because you are still thinking about a past encounter with someone?

 Soul ties are real and they are silently killing marriages and hindering relationships.  I say silently because most married people would not be caught talking about sex that they had with someone before their spouse.  Christian singles know that according to the word of God, they should not be having sex before marriage.  However, they still choose to have sex, but deal with soul ties silently.

If you are silently dealing with a soul tie because of an emotional, physical or spiritual connection that you previously had with someone, know that God is able to untie, break every chain and set you free!  If this issue does not pertain to you, please pray for all of the people who are silently dealing with a soul tie.

If you live in the D.M.V area, I want to personally invite you to come to our Saturday Night Live discussion on Soul Ties.  This event will be held at the First Baptist Church of Glenarden’s Ministry Center on Saturday, February 20th, 2016 at 7:00 PM (Refreshments will be served at 6:30 so come early).  The address is:  3600 Brightseat Road, Hyattsville, MD 20785.   If you know someone who is dealing with this, please share this blog with them.  We are praying that God will meet us in a special way and that everyone who is silently suffering can get healing for their soul in Jesus Name!

Until next week. . .

Carolyn

Will Your Love Last?

There are many who “fall in love” but few who “stay in love.”  Many get married, but few stay married until death departs them.  What makes a love relationship last?  Do you have what it takes to stay in a long lasting relationship?

In the beginning of a relationship most people present their best.  Their best is what is attractive.  However, if you hang around a person long enough, you will get to see their best and the other sides of their behavior.  If you are serious about marrying a person, it is so important that you observe a person in different seasons of life.  You need to observe their character, their behavior, their relationship with God, their work ethics, how they spend their money, the  way that they treat others and the way that they do life.  After being around long enough to observe all of this, then you are in a better position to decide if this is the person that you want to spend the rest of your life.

Marriage is God’s wonderful institution!  It does work and the love can last!  Are you willing to do what it takes to make your marriage last?

On Saturday, February 27th from 8:15-3:00, my husband and I will be participating in a Marriage Conference titled, “A Love That Last Forever.”  This conference is for married couples to come and spend the day investing in their marriage.  Come and spend time getting tools to make your marriage last forever.  Registration has already started and seats are limited.  The early bird special ends on this Sunday.   Click on the link below for more information and to register.   We would love to meet you there!

click here for information and to register

Do You Have a Comforter?

How many of you have a comforter on your bed right now?  It is always there to cover you and your bed, it makes your bedroom look nice, and it keeps you warm when its cold. Depending upon what it is made of, it can be very soft and comfortable.  It kind of reminds me of the Great Comforter.  Over the past month I have gone to at least 10 funerals.  Young and old are leaving here.  Although we know that every one must leave earth at some point, it is always challenging to see them go.  I just want to encourage anyone who has experienced a loss or know someone who has loss a spouse, child, mom, dad, family member or friend.  There is a Great Comforter and everyone needs to know who He is, what He does and when He does it.

Last week, I ministered at my first funeral.  It was one of the most challenging things that I have ever done.   It was for an infant but the Great Comforter helped me, the parents and all who attended.    Dealing with death is very challenging and no one wants to talk about it.  However, I think we need to talk about it because depending upon who dies in your life, it can greatly alter your life, marriage and family tremendously.  You wonder, how do you go on?  How will I make it?  Let me introduce you to  the Great Comforter. Everyone needs to know . . .

Who He Is?

2 Corinthians 1:3-5 tells us that God is a God of All Comfort.  He is the best Comforter that any of us could ever have.  He cares about every loss and pain that we could ever experience.  God doesn’t leave us comfortless, He sent His son Jesus Christ and He sent His Holy Spirit to live with us on a day to day basis.  So knowing Who He is, is realizing that you can have the presence of God in your life helping you to get through anything.

What He does?

God knows the pain that you feel so He is the only one who knows exactly how to comfort you.  He will strengthen you when you are weak and help you to get through when you never thought that you could.  He gives guidance and tells you what to do when you are clueless. John 14:26 says He will teach you all things.  He provides peace in the midst of the storm. He loves you when you feel all alone.  I am talking about the God of ALL Comfort.

When He does it?

When a person gives their life to Jesus Christ and accepts Him as Lord, He puts His Spirit in you.  John 14:17 tells us that His Spirit lives with us and will be in us.  He will never leave you nor forsake you (Deut. 31:6).  You can have comfort in knowing that you are never alone.  People will come and go, but the Great Comforter will ALWAYS be with you.  Life is worth continuing because you have a constant helper.  Be encouraged and know that you have a Great Comforter to help you through death and every challenge that life brings.

Until next week. . .

Carolyn

“Don’t You Give Up!”

Do you have a situation in your life that you are tired of dealing with?  Maybe it’s something in your mate or your marriage that makes you want to say, “I can’t take it any longer.” Perhaps you started the new year praying and fasting and now that we are almost half way through, you are about to give up.    I just want to encourage you to hang in there, don’t give up!

God has great rewards for those who endure to the end.  Many of us will miss our rewards because we give up.  The enemy’s job is to steal, kill and destroy by any means necessary  (John 10:10).   When we give up on our spouses, marriages, or any good thing, the enemy is happy. God is happy and gets the glory when we endure.

Instead of giving up, I want to encourage you to intensify your prayer life.  Whatever your challenge, find scriptures in the Bible that relate to your situation. There are scriptures for every area of life: finances, health, peace, joy, marriage, children, etc.  Praying God’s Word  is called praying promises. Rather than using your own words, pray the Word of God. It’s a sure way to get God’s attention.    Write them down, put them in your phone, place them some where you can see them on a regular basis.  Put your name, your spouses name or the name of the situation in the promise and began to pray.  Be consistent. After you have made your request known, keep thanking God until the change is manifested.

God doesn’t get the glory when we decide to quit.  My former pastor would often say,  “A quitter never wins and a winner never quits.”  Any body can give up but can you stay the course?  Can you hang in there? (Yes You Can)  You have to better equip yourself spiritually so that you can stay for the long haul.   Refuel yourself by praying God’s promises, keeping a positive perspective and perseverance.  In some cases you may have to partner with a person who will hold you accountable.   What ever you do, “DON”T GIVE UP!”

Until next week,

Carolyn

Want Something Different in 2016?

     I don’t know about you, but I can think of a few things that I want to be different in 2016.   Based on some of the conversations that I have been having with friends, I am not alone.

Some of the most common areas that we want to see different are:

• Marriage
• Finances
• Health/Diet/Exercise
• Habits
• Career
• Our relationship with God
• A family member’s relationship with God

If you really want to see something different, I want to encourage you to do some thing different and believe God!  Since God is the only One who can make a difference in ALL of our situations, let’s kick the year off by spending more time with Him.  He is our Change Agent.  He can fix what is broken, heal what is hurt, correct the things that are wrong, restore and break every chain. The question is how bad do you want it?

Are you willing to pray and fast?  In Matthew 17:21  Jesus says, “However, this kind does not go out except by prayer and fasting.”  Join me and hundreds of others who will start the new year off by praying and fasting. What does this mean? This means that we will be intentional about spending more time talking to God, reading God’s Word and abstaining from something that we normally enjoy to deny our flesh.  It’s a wonderful experience that brings wonderful results and benefits.  If you would like more information on the fast or would like to participate on our January prayer and devotional call, please see the flyer below. All are welcome!

Until next week  . .

.

Carolyn

What Are Your Holiday Traditions?

Are you ready to celebrate the birth of our Lord and Savior?  As you prepare, I want to encourage every family to be intentional about creating good memories and holiday traditions with your spouse, children, family members and friends.  I went to a Christmas fellowship a couple of weeks ago and when the question was asked, “What are your holiday traditions?” Surprisingly, not everyone could answer and not every one had happy memories of the holidays.

It is so important that we create good memories and establish some good traditions.  A memory is a mental impression retained.  The act or fact of retaining or recalling impressions. What kind of memories do you have of the holidays?  A tradition is something that is handed down.  you can hand down statements, beliefs, legends, customs, information or any practice from one generation to another.  Think about traditions that would promote love, togetherness and that are fun for the family.  Most importantly, we should create memories and traditions that  promote God’s love, kindness, goodness and that bring honor to God.

I know sometimes you just don’t have the energy to make some things happen, but just press on and think about how it will bless others. Different families have different traditions, here are a few of ours that that we enjoy.

1. Decorate a Christmas tree –  I get the kids involved in putting ornaments on the tree.  I love to listen to Christmas music as we decorate.  (The picture above is my Christmas tree).
2. Send Christmas cards –  We enjoy sending them and receiving them.  I also like to decorate with the cards that we receive.
3. Go to church on Christmas morning – I love going to God’s house as we celebrate His son’s birthday.  What a great way to start the day!
4. Bake a Birthday cake for Jesus and sing Happy Birthday Jesus – I love this one.  We started this when the kids were younger so that they could remember that it’s Jesus’ birthday.
5. Spend time with friends and family – I usually prepare a meal and have family over.  The day after Christmas, we go to visit others.
6. Cook a special meal – A nice dinner at the table is always a blessing.
7. Give gifts – As time and money will permit, I love to give gifts especially to children and those who are less fortunate.

There are so many things that can be done to celebrate the birth of Jesus and spread the love of Christ.  Let’s be intentional about creating good memories and  making lasting traditions.  If you have some bad memories or something that makes the holidays painful, it’s time to do something different. Create some new memories and some good traditions. Find someone that you can bless.  Pray and ask God to help you clear out the old, painful or negative memories and give you new, pleasant and meaningful memories.  God will do it!

Merry Christmas!

Carolyn

Do You Remember Your First Love?

God has a Present for You!

God has a very special  present for every married couple and every single. When you become aware and mindful of His present, your marriage and your life will never be the same.  Most of us know about it, but we don’t really take it seriously.   Do you want to know what this present is?

The present is God’s presence.  God says that He will never leave us nor forsake us (Hebrews 15:5).  Since God promises to never leave us, it simply means that He is always here.  So wherever you go, He goes.  Whatever you are doing, God is right there with you.  In Matthew 28:20 He says,  “low I will be with you always even unto the end.”  Now God is not physically there in the flesh but He is always with us in spirit.  Psalm 139:7 says, “Where can I go from Your Spirit? Or where can I flee from Your presence?”  The answer to that is nowhere, because God is ALWAYS present.

Now if each one of us would remember this and stay conscious of the fact that God is present, I believe that our lives and relationships would be different.  I take comfort in knowing that I don’t have to do marriage and relationships alone.  Being aware of His presence makes me a better person.  Knowing that God is present helps me to stay calm when I want to get upset, it helps me to do right when I would do wrong and His presence helps me to say the right thing when I would say the wrong.  The enemy wants us to believe that God doesn’t see us, but He  is the God who sees (El Roi, Genesis 16:13).  If you are ever in trouble, His presence will bless you because He is a very present help  (Psalm 46:1).

God wants us to be mindful of Him in everything that we do.  If this is a struggle for you pray and ask God to make you more aware of His presence.  Train yourself to focus on God, be aware of  His presence in your every day task.  Frequent awareness of Him will bring you so much joy, love, peace, patience and security.  Also, wisdom, direction and righteous living.  Always remember God’s special gift to you, His Presence !

Until next week . . .

Carolyn

“Do you want to see a change?”

“I am tired of dealing with this!”  When are you going to make a change? You say that you are going to change but you end up remaining the same. Husbands and wives argue because they have been going through the same thing for years. Is change really possible?  Do you want to see a change?

What does it mean to change?  So glad you asked, to change is to transform or convert, to substitute another or others for; exchange for something else.  It is also defined as to make the form, nature, content, future course of something different from what it is or from what it would be if left alone.

Do you have an area in your life or in your marriage that you want to see changed?  I know I do!  As difficult as it is for people to change, change is possible.  Many of us are frustrated because we want to change, we want our spouse to change or we want a situation  in our marriage to change.

Here are two prescriptions for change.

1. Keep going to the Change Agent – 2 Corinthians 5:17  says, “Therefore if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creature; old things are passed away; behold all things are become new.”  I have read this verse many times but for some reason the “In Christ” stands out to me.  When we are in Christ, He makes us new.  He is the Change Agent, no change is too hard for Him. The more time that we spend with Him, the more we change.  It is impossible to be in Christ and remain the same.  No matter what kind of change you need, keep going to the Change Agent. He will help you to do things differently on a consistent basis.
2. Keep putting truth in your mind and apply it! – Romans 12:2 says “And be not conformed to this world; but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind . . . ”  Feed your mind with God’s Word.  Find a scripture that relates to the change that you want to make and keep feeding your brain with the Word. Change is possible but you must renew your mind.  Different thoughts can produce different actions.

God is in the life changing business.  He changes things, He changes people and He changes situations.  If you really want to see a change take the prescription given.

Until next week . . .

Carolyn

“Thank God for Everything!”

     Do you have a fairy tale marriage?  We were having a Newlywed Fellowship in our home this weekend and this question came up in conversation.  I immediately answered no because everything isn’t quite the way that I would like for it to be.  However, my husband answered yes and explained why.  After listening to his response, I had to say thank you to God for everything!

My husband shared how God has gone beyond, beyond everything that he could ever hope for in his life and his marriage.  You see he didn’t know if he could be married and remain faithful to one woman for 17 years, but God.  He never thought he would have a beautiful home, wife and kids, but God.  So even though everything isn’t perfect, he could honestly say that God has given him a fairy tale marriage.  My husband says his marriage is better than he could have ever dreamed.

After listening to my husband testify, I had to agree and thank God for everything.  I thank Him for all of His blessings and the challenges.  The challenges have helped me to grow and to know God like I would have never known Him.   It’s a trick of the enemy to get us so focused on what’s not perfect in our mate, marriage or family.  Focusing on the imperfections can create a spirit of ungratefulness.  Ephesians 5:20 says, “always giving thanks to God the Father for EVERYTHING in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ. ”

Everything means every thing!  So no matter what you may be going through right now, give thanks!  Your spouse may not be acting right but give God thanks.  Thank God that you even have a spouse.  If your spouse is acting right, give God thanks.  Thank God for the  ups, downs, disappointments, challenges and the problems.  When you give God thanks in spite of how you may feel, He will give you joy.  The joy of the Lord is our strength.   So no matter what,  remember that God is with you. He will never leave you, nor forsake you.  As you go through each day, thank God for everything!

Happy Thanksgiving!

Carolyn