Marriage from A to Z

Principles for a Successful Marriage

“Why Divorce?”

divorce

     “I can’t take it any more!”  “I can’t forgive her/him for this!”  “It’s too hard!”  “I just want to be happy!”  “I am tired of dealing with this!”  “I want out!” Have you ever heard any of these statements before?  I have and usually they are the words that people say right before a divorce.

     Everyone knows that divorce is the termination of a marital union.  We live in a world where divorces are common.  If the marriage gets tough, challenging or if someone gets hurt, they get out.  Divorces are painful and were never meant to be easy.  The world makes it sound so simple.  “If the marriage doesn’t work, just get a divorce.”  Unfortunately, some Christians are living by this same statement.

      The question for this week is, “Why Divorce?”  According to Matthew 19:8, the answer to this question is a “hardened heart.”  A hardened heart is a spiritual condition and is defined as an inability to see, understand, firmly established or unlikely to change.  It also means to have no feeling, being stubborn to a given situation and refusing to be in God.  A hardened heart is one that is turned away from God.  Refusing to forgive someone and not granting mercy is an example of a hardened heart. Any of us can have a hardened heart.  When someone hurts you badly, it is easy to have a hardened heart.  When this happens we have to take the pain, frustration and disappointment to God.  Hard hearts can be softened, healed and changed  by the Word of God.  The problem is that most people don’t want to hang in there and wait for the change.  The enemy loves when we have hardened hearts because his desire is (John 10:10) to steal, kill and destroy. If he can get a husband or a wife to have a hardened heart, he can easily destroy a marriage and a family.

     Malachi 2:16 says, “For the Lord God of Israel says that He hates divorce, for it covers one’s garment with violence, says the Lord of hosts.  Therefore, take heed to your spirit that you do not deal treacherously.”  Taking heed to your spirit means that we must control our attitudes so that they line up with God’s spirit. In the commentary of my Bible, the word treacherously is explained, “To the Lord, attitudes of indifference to marriage vows and duties are the actions of a traitor.”

     If this week’s message does not apply to you, please take time to pray for those who are struggling in their marriages.  Maybe you are contemplating a divorce or know someone who is, keep praying! Don’t move too quickly!  Fight for your family!  Prayer changes people.  Be encouraged and know that God is able to fix, heal and restore any heart. Be patient and wait on God. He can do it! How do I know? ” I have seen Him do it!”

Until next week!

Carolyn

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