I’ve got pain, you’ve got pain, all of God’s children have some relationship pain! God is a relational God and therefore, He created us to be in relationships. We have relationships with our spouse, our children, our siblings, our parents, our friends and others. I believe that we learn some of our greatest lessons through being in relationships. Some times relationships are good, healthy and bring us a lot of joy. On the other hand, there are times when relationships are challenging and can bring us some pain. I know it’s not something that we like to talk about, but it’s real, and we need to know how to deal with our pain.
Relationship pain takes place when there is rejection, mistreatment, lack of communication, unfaithfulness, abandonment, abuse, death, and the list goes on and on. The bottom line is that something was done or said to hurt you badly and it causes some pain. Pain is defined as mental, emotional or physical suffering, torment or distress. Often times, the closer the person is to you, the greater the pain. When we experience pain, we have to decide what our next step will be. You may have to get counseling and there is nothing wrong with getting help. However, you will have to make some decisions. Will you forgive? Will you continue in the relationship? How will you function with the pain?
So what do you do when you are in a relationship that is causing you some pain? This week I want to share a prescription for pain that has helped me, and I hope that it will help you or someone you know.
P = Pray to God and ask for strength to get through the pain. Pray that you will be able to forgive and function. Communicate with God frequently. You can’t just pray one or two times, you have got to return to God over and over.
A = Accept the fact that God allowed it to happen. God has a purpose and a plan for our pain. Our pain should draw us closer to God, don’t allow the enemy to turn you away from God in the midst of your pain. Often times your pain becomes the very avenue to help others. “God will use your misery to be become your ministry.” Romans 8:28 says that ALL things work together for the good to those who love God.
I = Imitate Christ in the midst of pain. Ask yourself the question, “What would Jesus do?” Spend time reading His Word to get strength and direction. His Word teaches us how to live godly. Jesus teaches us to forgive, remember when He was being crucified, He said “Father forgive them, for they know not what they do.” (Luke 23:34) Sometimes the people who cause us pain don’t know what they are doing.
N = Numbness, to become numb means to be deprived of physical sensation. If every time we think of the pain, we break down, we have got to become numb. When you become numb to the pain, you can function well without breaking down. This means getting to the point where it doesn’t bother you. Sometimes we do well in this area and then something else is done or said to make the pain resurface. When this happens we have to take this prescription again, just like when you get sick and take medicine, when the medicine wears off, you have to take it again. In addition, N = NEVER GIVE UP!
Be encouraged and know that this is only a prescription for pain. Doctor Jesus is the ultimate comforter and healer of whatever you may be going through. Nothing is too hard for Him!
Until next week . . .