1 + 1 = 3
Our teachers taught 1 + 1 = 2. However, when a husband and a wife begin multipying 1 + 1 = 3, 4, 5 and so on. Psalm 127:3-5a tells us that, children are a gift from God and blessed is the man who fills his quiver with them! Many of the babies that were conceived in the winter are being born this summer. When children come, relationships change. This week I want to share a few things to keep in mind after having children. If you are not in this season, you may know someone who is, please share this with them.
There are several things that parents can do to maintain a great relationship after having children. Maintaining requires a lot of juggling of your time and yourself. Some parents do it well and some do not. Here are four areas that I want to encourage all parents to maintain as they raise children and strive to maintain a successful marriage.
- Maintain your relationship with God – A newborn baby will often change your sleep pattern and your schedule. In the midst of waking up throughout the night and getting the baby adjusted to life, be prayerful. Talk to God while you are nursing, changing diapers and taking care of your children. As they get older, pray for them, pray with them and pray as a couple. You teach your children how to have a relationship with God by your actions. Make God a priority in your family through prayer, reading scripture and taking them to God’s house (church) on weekly basis.
- Maintain time for yourself – I know this is difficult especially for moms who have a newborn baby and for those with multiple children. Although children are gifts, they require a lot of time and attention. As parents, it is easy to spend so much time meeting the needs of our children and neglect our selves. I encourage all of the ladies to maintain your outward appearance. Don’t make your children the reason that you do not maintain your hair or keep your self attractive. Maintenance is very important. My grandmother told me, “The same thing you did to attract your husband is the same thing that you need to do to keep him.”
- Maintain time with your spouse – Remember your first baby? That’s the one you said I do to. As you love, adore and take care of your precious gift/s from God always remember your spouse. Be intentional about having uninterrupted time together on a regular basis. It may be the time that your children are sleep or it may be getting a baby sitter to come while you and your spouse have a date. I know it’s a challenge but it can be done. Parents who don’t learn how to maintain time for each other while raising children can easily separate. Children learn all about love from our examples. What kind of example are you setting?
- Maintain time as a family – There are so many demands on our time today. However, we must make time to spend together as a family. You can start by simply having your meals together at the table (without cell phones). Get into each other’s world. Ask the basic question each day, “How was your day?” Plan trips, go for a walk/ride, spend time in the park, go to a movie or whatever, just do it together.
The enemy desires to steal and kill our marriages and our family. (John 10:10) Don’t let him win. Do everything that you can to maintain your marriage and your family.
Until next week . . .