Marriage from A to Z

Principles for a Successful Marriage

Is that the way you really want it?


“We should get a divorce.” “I’ll never get married.”  “You get on my last nerves.” I am tired of you.”  “I can’t take it anymore.” “She/He makes me sick.” “You’re going to worry me to death.” “I didn’t marry the right person.”  “Leave me alone.” “I’ll never lose the weight.” “You never. . .”  What do all of these statements have in common?  They are all negative!  As human beings, we have the tendency to speak negatively to ourselves and to others.   Let’s evaluate our words.  When you make a statement to yourself or to someone else, ask yourself, “Is this the way I really want it?”  If the answer is no, don’t say it!

Proverbs 18:21 says “Death and life are in the power of the tongue, and those who love it will eat its fruit.”  Therefore, we must fill our life with positive words and not negativity. What have you been saying or texting lately?   Too much is at stake for us to walk around filling our conversations with things that we really don’t want to happen.  Do you realize that the world was created by words?  God spoke and the universe was created. (Hebrews 11:3). Imagine what we could create if we would learn to speak the right words.  On the other hand, think about what we are destroying by speaking the wrong words.  Learn the Word of God, speak the Word of God and pray the Word of God.  Speak things that you really want God to do.  Before you let words roll out of your mouth, stop and and ask yourself, “Is this really the way that I want it?”  If not, don’t say it!

As a person with the melancholy temperament, I am naturally inclined to be critical. Being critical often means that I see the negative before I see the positive.  Therefore, I have to work really hard to speak positively in spite of the negatives that I see.  It’s easy to operate from a negative place.  However, God wants us to walk in His Spirit and speak from a place of love, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. (Galatians 5:22)  We must be intentional about this when we talk to ourselves and to others.  How do you want to be remembered?

Negative statements are killing us, our marriages, children, family and friends.  Enough is enough!  Your words are very powerful! If you want a positive marriage, spouse, family, relationship or anything positive, you must speak positively!   Lord please forgive us for the negative words that we have spoken.  Help us to get rid of our stinking thinking and to speak words of life, not death.

Think about these statements:

“You become what you believe.”

“It’s impossible to produce anything positive when you’re sowing seeds of negativity.”

Until next week. . .





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One thought on “Is that the way you really want it?

  1. Charmaine on said:

    Great word for the week Mrs. Carolyn.

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