“What is your conduct in conflict?”
Have you ever disagreed with your spouse, child, family member, friend or a co-worker? Of course you have, we are human, and we will not always agree or see things the same way. Conflict is inevitable! The question for this week is; “What is your conduct in the midst of the conflict?”
Your conduct is your personal behavior or the way that you act. We have conflict when we come into a collision, clash or disagreement with someone. It can also mean you are in a battle, fight or just struggling with someone or something. Think about the last conflict that you had, how did you handle it? What was your behavior?
Your answer to this question is important to God. He already knows how you conduct yourself. We know that God is omniscient and omnipresent which means that He has complete, unlimited knowledge, and that He is present everywhere at the same time. God sees the way that you respond, talk and treat others in the midst of the conflict. So if He were to grade you on how well you conduct yourself in the midst of conflict what would your grade be?
I think many of us can look for ways to earn a higher grade. One of the first lessons that I learned when having conflict in my marriage is that it is not okay to behave anyway that I want, when I am angry. Cursing, name calling, physically fighting, not speaking for days is not okay with God.
Two verses that have convicted me about my behavior is: I Corinthians 13:4-6 which says; that love suffers long and it is kind. When you are in the midst of conflict, you may feel like you are suffering and maybe you are. Suffering for a long time and being kind do not go together in the human mind. However, with God, we can suffer and still be kind! I am a witness! This passage goes on to say that love does not behave rudely. This means, you don’t have permission to be discourteous, impolite, rough, harsh or ungentle.
God knows that there are people and situations that will make us angry however, his word says; “Be angry and do not sin”: do not let the sun go down on your wrath (Ephesians 4:26). This verse has taught me that it is okay to get angry, but we have to control our behavior so that we do not sin. It also tells us not to carry the anger to bed, let it go. Sometimes you have to agree to disagree and be okay with it.
Next week, I will continue to discuss dealing with conflict. Today, I want to encourage you to spend some time examining your conduct. Pray and ask God if He is pleased? Be intentional about displaying better behavior in the midst of your conflicts.
Until next week . . .
Carolyn
Marriage from A to Z 