Marriage from A to Z

Should You Text or Talk?

          A few weeks ago, I went away to a Women’s Retreat and had a wonderful time!  While I was away, my husband and I communicated each day.  We would talk in the morning and text throughout the rest of the day.  On one of the days, he texted me a question about a matter that he was experiencing.  I did not know the answer, but  I responded by asking him a question to get clarity.  We sent a couple of text back and forth and then I realized by the tone of the text that he was upset and offended.  I read back over my words but could not understand the problem.  At this point, I responded and said, “let’s not send another text, as soon as I am able to talk, I will call you.”  Can any body identify with this situation?  Some times your text is not communicating what you think it is and sometimes your words are misunderstood.  When you detect that there is a problem with a text, should you keep texting  or start talking?

     Yes we live in a world where texting is popular and many are texting rather than talking.  However, there comes a time when you need to talk.  Communication is so important, it’s the lifeline of a relationship.  There are some things that are best communicated by talking over the phone and sometimes in person.  When you can hear a person’s voice and see their facial expressions, it will help you to fully understand the words that are being communicated.  However, when the words are in a text, one can easily be misunderstood or mis-interpreted.  In my case, my husband got upset and offended over something that “he thought I said” but in actuality, I did not. It wasn’t until I got home that we were able to talk in person and bring clarity to the conversation.

The enemy’s job is to steal, kill and destroy (John 10:10) by any means necessary.  If he can get into your conversation and create division or cause confusion, he will.  Depending upon where you are and what you are doing, you may not be able to talk.  Therefore, texting is convenient.  Being able to send a text can be a blessing, however, be cautious about what you put into a text and the tone.  When you see or discern that a text is getting any type of negative response, stop and when time permits, take time to talk. The relationship with your spouse, children, friend or family member is valuable.  Don’t use texting as your primary/only means of communication, especially if you are dating and trying to get to know a person.

God created us to be relational.  I want to encourage you, as I encourage myself to take more time to talk.  I realize that some people are challenging to talk to and some times your really don’t have time to talk.  However, communication is important for marriages and other relationships to remain healthy.  Be mindful of how much you are texting verses talking.

Until next week  . . .

Carolyn